bright, shiny, new year...

i woke up this afternoon morning wonderfully hangover free.

 i spent a mellow, relaxed new years at home with my family, although R was hauling bodies at work and was greatly missed. we had a great little spread that was way way scaled back from what we usually have. cheese and crackers with  fruit, steamed shrimp, and a sweet little nibblet my bro and i thought up. we were craving hot wings but didnt want to put up the cash or go out, sooo i just cubed up some lean chicken breasts, lightly pan fried them and coated em in pepper sauce. mmmmmm yummy, cheap, and healthier than take-out. armed with finger food and wine, we waited for 2011 to arrive.

about 30 seconds till midnight, i got a phone call from my love and we rang in the new year together watching fireworks. i would have loved to have him there for a kiss, but it was still wonderful.

2010 was just about the best year i've ever lived through. and thinking back on it, i actually feel like i was alive this year, not just existing from one year to the next. i saw dreams come true, goals achieved, and futures begun. it was truly amazing, and i cant wait to see what 2011 brings.

and now rolling with the cheerful cliche of a new year, i have a couple of goals to make.

i want to lose weight. duh. i want to get healthier. and i am determined to work hard at it. what i am not going to do this year is to make it a competition. you cant compete with yourself, and competing with others only results in someone coming up short. i dont want to do that. the thing i DO want to do, feel better, physically, by gradually reducing my body weight. i'm going to start posting numbers and weekly weigh ins again, because i feel ready for it. i've taken my time to work on my issues, and now i'm ready to take control again.

as of this morning, i weighed in at 342.4. yipes. but i'm not going to wallow. i'm going to work.

luckily, i have some neat tools, including my new favorite thing...


its a reusable, plastic cup with a straw! it holds a cool 16 oz, is double walled so that it won't sweat, and both the cup and straw are made of hard, durable, eco-friendly plastic. also, it looks like a take-out cup, which is awesomely cute. its so much sweeter than a water bottle and its pink. i picked one up at old navy when i was doing my post-christmas sale-ing, and i loved it so much i went out and bought another one.

 it helps me improve my water intake and its wicked adorable, which makes it fun.

i'm also working on keeping a budget, and creating a household budget for R and i. combining two incomes (or his income and my occasional babysitting cash....until i get a job after graduation) and two different spending habits and styles is going to be interesting, but we're making this plans and following through.

another thing, i want to take better care of myself to improve and maintain fertility. i'm not planning on getting pregnant for another couple of years, but i want to improve my chances for when we're ready. i've been tracking my periods and ovulations and it's helped me become more aware of what my body goes through throughout the month and how it effects my appetite, moods, sleeping habits, and energy levels.

another goal, to stop being afraid of the doctor. i need to make dental appointments, and check-ups and what not, and actually go to them. i need to stop being so afraid of what might be found, that i hide and ignore instead. that needs to change.

i am excited and a little scared to see all the changes 2011 has in store for me and for my future, but i am resolved to face it head on.

happy new year to everyone, i hope it's started out amazingly.

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